MARRIAGE & DIVORCE

Marriage and divorce are very controversial subjects. Many denominations have taught that marrying someone who is divorced is adultery. Some denominations even recommend breaking up with your second wife and children and going back to the first, which contradicts the various teachings from our Creator.  No doubt, our Creator prefers that once you get married, you stay married, no matter what the cost, “let not man put asunder” (Mark 10:9). When He returns at the Seventh Trumpet as a bridegroom, He is going to select his bride or wife, (144,000 saints) place them in a spiritual body, and they will be with the resurrected Messiah from that point forward, and there never will be a divorce. 

 

Genesis, chapter 2:24 says, “A man shall leave his parents and cleave to his wife [not wives] and the two shall become one flesh.”  This scripture shows that our Creator intended for us to have one wife and when we become one flesh and are married, we have one purpose that we share. When the scripture says “they are one,” it does not mean that they are same; it means they have the same purpose.  In Exodus, chapter 34:16, the Israelites are instructed not to marry the heathen (the unbelievers). thus our Creator wants you to marry someone that is a believer.  Paul makes it clear if your spouse, and your children are unbelievers, you are to stay married and they will be set apart or sanctified because of your faith (1 Corinthians 7:14). 

 

Deuteronomy, chapter 24:1-4, contains the law of marriage and divorce.  Husbands that divorced their wives because of the hardness of their hearts were to give the woman a written bill of divorce, Matthew 19:1-12.  This was to protect the woman so that if that woman ended up with another man after her verbal divorce that first husband could become extremely jealous and say that she is committing adultery and should be stoned to death.  Instead, the woman could produce a written bill of divorcement to keep this from happening.  The law (Deuteronomy 24:1-4) also said that if a man divorces his wife, and gives her a written bill of divorcement, she is able to go out and marry a new husband. However, if her second husband gives her a written bill of divorcement, it is an abomination (horrible sin) for her to go back to her first husband. That is to say, it is a significant sin, but with true repentance, our Creator will forgive and forget.  But even when you are forgiven, you may still receive some punishment. King David committed adultery as well as premeditated murder, and as a result of his sins, the innocent child from his and Bathsheba’s encounter died.  

 

 In Deuteronomy 24:5, a new husband and wife have the benefit that the man does not have to go to war for up to a year, which would allow children, should he later be killed in war.  This gives them time to be “fruitful and multiply” as our Creator wants (Genesis 1:28).   

 

Nehemiah, chapter 13:23 says that the Jews married strange wives (that is unbelievers).  Our Creator, warned against this because unbelievers had different so-called false “gods”.  In Nehemiah 13:26, “did not Solomon king of Israel sin by these things” i.e., have a number of wives that were unbelievers and worshipped so-called gods, i.e., false gods, graven images, idols.  In the book of Ezra 10:10-20, they were told to separate themselves from strange wives.  Some groups wrongly use this scripture as an out, that they may get divorced because they made a mistake and married an unbeliever.  However, Ezra and Nehemiah did not have the benefit of Paul’s teaching in the New Testament where he makes it clear that once you are called, baptized and have hands laid on you, that you have to continue in the marriage, even if your wife is an unbeliever. The reason for this is that your unbelieving wife and children are sanctified, (1 Corinthians 7: 1-10) i.e., set apart through your marriage, whereas if you divorced your unbelieving wife, they would be unsanctified.  Paul makes it clear that after you are called and repent, (1 Corinthians 7:17-24) your past sins are forgiven.  But, if the unbeliever leaves, i.e., divorces you, then you are not bound in such cases. 

 

1 Kings 11:1-4 notes that Solomon had many strange wives. In fact, he had 700 wives and 300 concubines and when he was old, he turned his heart after other Elohim.  Malachi 2:15-16 notes that our Creator, i.e., the Yahweh of the Old Testament, the Rock, and now Resurrected Messiah, Yahweh Shua hates (loves less) divorce.  Matthew 5:31-32 says, “whoever puts away his wife, must give her a bill of divorcement, but whoever puts away his wife without a bill of divorcement causes her to commit adultery and whoever marries a woman that is put away [not divorced] commits adultery.” The word for putting away, in the Greek 630 (apoluō), is dismiss, meaning without a bill of divorcement. This is confirmed in Matthew 1:18-21 where Joseph thought about putting away (apoluo) Mary.  Matthew 19:3-9 says that whomever puts away his wife and marries another, commits adultery.  If you marry someone that is put away (not divorced) you both commit adultery.  Unfortunately, many different versions of the Bible abound and the original Hebrew and Greek texts have been distorted in some places.   

 

A divorce (bill of divorcement) and putting away (no bill of divorce, still husband and wife) are two entirely different things.  When King David put his wives away, he did not divorce them, he just did not honor his marriage like he was supposed to.  If you marry someone who has been put away that is adultery. Luke, the physician, (Luke 6:18 KJV) has it correct “Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery :and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.”  

 

Another scripture that has torn many families apart due to an incomplete understanding is Romans 7:2 and 3.   It is a favorite passage of those who teach that remarriage is adultery.  A woman with a husband  must wait until her husband dies to re-marry. It is that simple. Paul’s writings are clear and he knew the Law! Unfortunately, people do not realize when he uses the term husband that it means the two are still married and do not have a legal written divorce.  The scriptures cannot contradict themselves. In Deuteronomy 24:1-4, it is clear that Moses (at the direction of our Creator) said if a man divorces the woman and gives her a bill of divorcement, she is free to go marry another man.  It is not ideal, however, as our Creator wants us to stay married.  In 1 Corinthians 7:39, the wife is bound by the law as long as her husband is alive.  This too is misunderstood, as Paul is saying that if you stay married then you are husband and wife.  You must get a legal written bill of divorcement, to no longer be husband and wife.  Otherwise, you must wait till your spouse dies.   

 

Paul’s writings do not contradict the law of Yahweh.  In 1 Corinthians 7:20, Paul tells us to abide in the same calling wherein we are called.  In other words, when you are called, are baptized, repent, get hands laid on and start overcoming, your robes are white, your sins completely forgiven and your sins are no longer remembered by your Creator.  In 1 Corinthians 7:13-16, Paul notes that the unbelieving spouse and children are set apart by the believing spouse.  Paul advises the unmarried to marry to avoid burning with desire. In Matthew Chapter 5:28, our Creator warns that one who looks at another’s wife with lustful thoughts has committed adultery.  In Acts 15:29 we learn that we have to abstain from fornication, adultery and lust, both physically and spiritually. 

 

In 1 Corinthians 7:25-28, Paul makes it clear that if you are married, do not seek a divorce, and if you are divorced, don’t seek a wife.  However, if you should marry, you have not sinned. The word for divorce that Paul uses in his scriptures is in the Greek 3080 loosed, breaking of the matrimonial bond.  Again, Paul (a strict Pharisee who knew the law and was personally taught by the resurrected Messiah Yahweh Shua for 3 years, Gal 1:1-18) gives clear simple understanding to a complex subject. 

 

Thus, we see that Paul’s writings are completely harmonious with Deuteronomy and the law of marriage and divorce that was given by Moses at the direction of our Creator.  As you know, He is the Yahweh of the Old Testament and Melchizedek of the Old Testament, the Rock.  Paul notes in 1 Timothy 3:2 “A Bishop then must be blameless, husband of one wife; thus vigilant, sober, good behavior, given to hospitality, apt to teach”, etc.  Then, what about the case of a Bishop or a man that has made a mistake in his past i.e., been married and divorced and remarried?  This seems to contradict 1 Timothy.  Again, Paul is clear in 1 Corinthians 7:20 for you to abide in the same calling.  If you are called after you have been married and divorced and you get baptized in the name of our Resurrected Messiah, Yahweh Shua, and get hands laid on, all those past sins are forgiven.  Further, you would now be the husband of one wife, the sins in your past having been forgiven, but often we do receive some punishment for these mistakes. 

 

Yahweh Shua, the resurrected Messiah, the bridegroom is coming for his bride and he will never divorce his bride, (the 144,000 saints at the Seventh Trumpet, Revelation 11:15, Revelation 14:1). Try to find reasons to stay married.  If one spouse leaves, try to work things out by seeking counseling if you can.  As Paul says (1Cor 7:10-11) “let not the wife depart from her husband: but if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband, and let not a man forsake his wife” (KJV/Aramaic). If there is abuse, it’s better to separate and to try to work things out through marriage counseling and remain married if at all possible. Remember the admonition to men, to not forsake the wife of your youth (Mal 2:14).                   

 

 If you find this article interesting, pray to the Father for wisdom in the name of his son, Yahweh Shua, our wonderful Creator.  Read the other articles on this website for further understanding.  Once you are ready, consider taking the first step of baptism in Yahweh Shua’s name. Before you do, however, count the cost, but remember the members of the Light of Yahweh Shua are here to support you. May Yahweh bless your journey.

 If you wish to submit a question or comment, please email our Elder at john12e4567@gmail.com.